Pretension

There is good and bad in seeking to be what we are not.

How shall I know if it fits unless I try it on?

That’s presumption

Pretension is closer to hypocrisy than presumption. 

Each of us is blind to our own falsity. 

Forswearing exaggeration

Can lead to the ditch on the other side of the road,

self –abnegation.

We learn from the actions and consequences of others. 

Testing our perceptual accuracy.   

Superstitious reasoning can undercut social and private judgments.

        

We label some pretenders

Due to a mismatch between who they think they are, and who we see them to be.

This does not make us any more correct than them. 

Our audience is a powerful influence on our private interpretations

Should peer opinion be the final judge of who we are?

Some defer too much to the court of public opinion

Others are too slow to do so.

The audacious take chances for their own development. 

Risking indictable hubris. 

We are on trial internally and externally. 

If our inside judge is too lenient

We get harsh treatment from external judges

Assimilation is a match between these judges 

Why is this important? 

Our private reflections are our developmental ceiling. 

We can swing wildly between overconfidence and crises of self-esteem. 

The opposite of pretension is authenticity. 

Everyone would prefer to be fully authentic, never pretentious,

But greatness requires audacity

Hence the conundrum

Here is what I take:

Seek to please communities

Expecting the best from you

Not those calling you pretender